Responding to widespread criticism of its latest gerrymandering effort, Texas Republicans once again offered a revised map for the US House of Representatives voting districts for the 2026 mid-terms. Rep. John Grisel, sponsor of the measure, explained the rationale. “Okay whiners, we’ve made it really simple for you: three large urban districts and 35 rural ones, emphasizing the boundless stretches of our great state of Texas. We’ve already had an earful of public reaction, so this is a “Take It or Leave It” deal. We’re voting next week.”
Democrats cried foul. Norm Justus, Rep. of Austin, pointed out a flaw. “70% of Democrats and Independents are clustered into three huge districts, leaving the rest of Texan representatives to be elected by a minority of the population. This is ridiculous! We’ll take this to court!”
Daniel Axelrod, head of the Republican National Committee, dismissed the criticism. “There we go again. Every time something doesn’t go their way in elections, the Democrats file a lawsuit. Where’d they get that idea, anyway? It’s just childish.”
“They really should take the partisan politics out of redistricting” said Oliver Statelah. “Other states have done so, creating a fair and balanced outcome. Why not Texas? They could put some time into governing instead of petty fighting.”
When asked about the renewed round of criticism, Rep. Grisel threw his hands in the air, saying, “Here we go again with the whining!”
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