President Trump today invited Senate Republicans to join him for a Happy Hour at the White House.
Trump said he would say a toast to all loyal Senators with a glass of his new cocktail, the JJ. “It contains a healthy dose of Ivermectin with a floater of vermouth; tastes great!” he extolled. Sources close to the president said “he expects a show of party unity with everyone drinking together in a social setting. Everyone!”
Robert Kennedy, the Secretary of HHS, has touted the mixture as a healthy alternative to the martini. “It’s like a probiotic, only it tastes better.”
Trump suggested, “We should do this more often, monthly at least. I’m thinking of mixing in some hydroxychloroquine and chloroquine. That should give it a little bite. By the end of the year, we should see some real results. You know, everyone happy, acting together, in unison, all agreeing with my, er, our proposals to make America great again. This is gonna be great!”
Meanwhile, flights out of Reagan National Airport were suddenly booked to the max for domestic flights. Legislators at gates cited urgent meetings in their constituent regions. Asked about his destination, one aide said, “I don’t care where we’re going as long as it’s not Guyana. This has Jim Jones written all over it!”
